If You’re New to Seattle, Here’s What You Need

Slog PM: R. Kelly Charged With 10 Counts of Sexual Abuse, Sen. Klobuchar Ate Salad With a Comb, More Seattle Snow

Waiter,  would you bring me a nice fine-toothed comb?
Waiter, would you bring me a nice fine-toothed comb? barol16/Getty Images

Canada's National Energy Board says fuck the environment: The board recommended that Canada move forward with its Trans Mountain pipeline expansion. It acknowledged that the expansion would be pretty fucking bad for the environment but that it's in Canada's interests and so Canada should just do it, environment and fragile orca populations be damned. Gov. Jay Inslee is upset about the decision. Canada's government has 90 days for the consideration.

Amazon employee fired for 'time theft': That's what Amazon allegedly told the call center employee in Kentucky when he was fired. That employee suffers from the digestive disorder Crohn's Disease. He has filed a lawsuit saying that Amazon violated the Americans with Disabilities Act by firing him for extra time he spent in the bathroom. Amazon claims it does not monitor bathroom breaks.

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NewsCity

Seattle Lost Its Beto, Labor Picks Myers, Walkinshaw Picks Scott, and More City Council Election News!

Bye bye Beto!
Bye bye Beto! Lester Black

There may be more Democrats running for president than you can keep track of but we have our own local government to elect—so pay attention, Seattle! Seven out of the nine seats on the Seattle City Council are up for election this year with our primary vote in August. Here’s the biggest news from the campaign trail this week.

Buh Bye Beto: Non-profit director Beto Yarce announced this week that he was suspending his campaign to unseat Councilmember Kshama Sawant. Beto, who is the executive director of Ventures, is being coy about his exact reason for dropping out, only saying, “[I will] take what I have learned through this process and channel it into other programs, organizations, and opportunities that satisfy the goals I established in my campaign."

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I Took the Whole Box of Thin Mints From the Office Snack Table

These are mine
These are mine RS

In case anyone was wondering, I took the entire box of Thin Mints from the snack table. The Girl Scouts sent us a basket full of cookies to promote an upcoming dinner event where local chefs plan to use certain kinds of cookies to create a three course meal. The box of Thin Mints was included in the basket, and I just took the whole thing without even thinking about it.

It would be dishonest for me to say that I took the cookies for any particular reason. In retrospect I could say that I took them to eliminate the annoyance of overhearing people hemming and hawing over the caloric consequences of eating one or two Thin Mints before eventually succumbing to the impulse and grabbing a few. Or I could say that I took them because I truly believe that eating an individual Thin Mint is an essentially inconsequential act. The serving size of a Thin Mint is two sleeves and/or one box, and so by taking the whole box I was really only taking one Thin Mint. But really I just saw the box and took it and nobody around me stopped it from happening because it was late and the snack table is a lawless place.

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Enter Your Pet in The Stranger's Ugly Pet Contest!

Last years winner, Sharky.
Last year's winner, Sharky.

Is your cat the gnarliest beast this side of Bellevue? Does your dog have a face only a mother could love? Is your bird just plain old bad-looking? If so, your beloved animal could end up on the cover of The Stranger's Pet Issue!

Our second annual Ugly Pet Contest is sponsored by Jet City Animal Clinic, and it is open to any hideous furry, feathered, or hairless companions that live within Seattle city limits. (If your pet is a finalist, we'll send a photographer to your house, and we're not driving to Tacoma, sorry.)

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Endman Wants You to Watch Yourself

Endman by Karissa Sakumoto out on Cold Cube Press now
Endman by Karissa Sakumoto out on Cold Cube Press now Jasmyne Keimig
Reading Portland-based creator Karissa Sakumoto's book Endman is a bodily experience—which is strange to say about a work on paper. Endman is one of the latest releases from Seattle risograph press/publisher Cold Cube Press, dropping earlier this February. The 24-page book seems to occupy a space between reality, the page, and a digital landscape. It reminds me of the graphics in a video game. The way the scenes and images are curated together lends itself to the book's almost unstable existence in your hands—you at once feel like you are in it and observing it happen from another stratosphere.

“What I wanted with Endman was to not really make a complete story, but like these disconnected dreamlike bits where it sounds more like the narrator is speaking to herself than to the reader,” Sakumoto tells me over email. “Or, like, you are watching her but you feel like you shouldn't be there.”

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A New Sushi Spot Opens in Capitol Hill and More Seattle Food News You Can Use: Feb. 22, 2019 Edition

Taneda, a new sushi and kaiseki spot from a chef whos spent time at I Love Sushi and co-owns Fremont Bowl, is now open in Capitol Hills Broadway Alley.
Taneda, a new sushi and kaiseki spot from a chef who's spent time at I Love Sushi and co-owns Fremont Bowl, is now open in Capitol Hill's Broadway Alley. Taneda via Facebook

This week, Tacoma gets a new place for burgers, Filipino pop-up Musang announces an upcoming brick-and-mortar spot in Beacon Hill, and Marmite chef Bruce Naftaly goes head-to-head with the Food Network's Bobby Flay. Read on to discover more details about all of that, plus more of Seattle's latest food news and plans for your weekend (like a colored pasta workshop from Linda Miller Nicholson of Salty Seattle). For more things to eat and drink, try our list of unique margaritas to try for National Margarita Day, our list of food and drink specials to try in February and our full food and drink calendar.

OPENINGS
Beefy's Burgers
On Wednesday, February 20, this burger joint from Robert Stocker, the owner of Tacoma's retro-style Shake Shake Shake, opened inside the former space of Stocker's defunct fish and chips spot Fish Fish Fish on 6th Avenue. The new eatery will feature hamburgers, cheeseburgers, crinkle-cut fries, and milkshakes.
Tacoma

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What the Fuck Is "With Extra Lobster"?

1548976856-savage-letter-of-the-day-stamp-2019.jpg

Recent Savage Love Letters of the Day: America's most notorious biphobe (according to the anime avatar brigades) talks another guy into identifying as bisexual, a girlfriend with a boyfriend who won't cut off his toxic, violent, vodka-bottle-swinging ex, another girlfriend who is lovely and kind and smart and jealous and irrational, and where are all the peggers? And, as always, last week's column and Savage Lovecast.

First, something I left out of my response to DAMN:

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Seattle, What's a Girl Gotta Do to Get a Fucking E-Scooter Around Here?

A rainy scoot around Piedmont Park in Atlanta, GA.
A rainy scoot around Piedmont Park in Atlanta, GA. Nathalie Graham

I visited Atlanta, Georgia last week. Atlanta, I quickly discovered, is not a walkable city. The week I was there my primary mode of transportation was by e-scooter. And I have to confess: I'm obsessed. Scooters are fast and fun, they're cheap and everywhere. I felt like I was behind-the-times on this transportation trend—and I was. Seattle was the first city to get dockless bike share. Why does it feel like we're the last to get these fucking scooters?

The hills, I thought, as my e-scooter chugged up an Atlanta incline (the equivalent of like, Broadway Ave's incline on Capitol Hill). It had to be the hills. I still cleared 13 mph on the electric motor-assisted scooter as it puffed along, but it was noticeably slower than the rubber I was burning at 18 mph on a straightaway. That had to be what was holding Seattle back. Or, maybe, the rain?

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The Young Turks Come to Washington State on a Quest to Overturn Citizens United

Break out your powdered wigs, baby! Its time to talk about the viability of constitutional conventions!
Break out your powdered wigs, baby! It's time to talk about the viability of constitutional conventions! William Thomas Cain / GETTY

On Friday afternoon, the Washington State Senate committee will hear a bill often dismissed as a potentially disastrous pipe dream. The resolution would ask Congress to convene a "limited" constitutional convention for the purposes of "proposing a free and fair elections amendment," which would effectively overturn Citizens United and end the corrupting influence of money in politics. State Senator Patty Kuderer, who introduced the bill, says she expects the resolution "to receive serious consideration by the committee," arguing that "we can’t go it alone in fixing our elections."

Cenk Uygur, host of the online news show The Young Turks, will travel to Olympia to testify in support of the bill. Over the phone, he claimed a hundred local volunteers from Wolf PAC, a political organization he founded to push for a convention, will join him in the chamber.

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German Guitar God Michael Rother Discusses Working with Eno, a Blown Bowie Collab, and His Alleged Disdain for Bass

It’s possible that somebody in [Bowies camp] decided just to make sure that no crazy German experimentalist would interfere with the pop artist David Bowie.
"It’s possible that somebody in [Bowie's camp] decided just to make sure that no crazy German experimentalist would interfere with the pop artist David Bowie." MAX ZERRAHN

In the third and final edition of The Stranger's interview with Michael Rother, he discusses a missed opportunity with David Bowie, collaborating with Brian Eno, the rumor about his aversion to bass frequencies, his music's alleged New Age qualities, the bureaucratic nightmare of booking a US tour, and more. You can read part 1 here and part 2 here.

The Stranger: One thing I don’t think people acknowledge enough about your music is its soulfulness, the deep emotional aspect to your music. It seems like people are wowed by your tone and the rhythms, the hypnotic nature, but I think there’s a real soulfulness to your solo records, among some of your other music.
That sounds very nice. I would buy that. [laughs]

What emotions are you trying to convey in your solo albums, if you could pinpoint?
It’s not the result really of being determined to convey certain emotions, it’s just what happens when you make music. And, of course what happens, what goes on in your life at a certain time, has some effect on the results, and so good things and less nice things, sad things; they all affect your feelings, and so when I go into the studio I start making music, I don’t purposefully try to express dark moods or happy feelings; it just happens.

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An Opera About the Last Hero of Capitalism

It’s one act, and the brilliant but complicated Apple CEO is in every scene.
It’s one act, and the brilliant but complicated Apple CEO is in every scene. KEN HOWARD

We will get to Steve Jobs in a moment. First we must discuss Joseph Schumpeter.


During the middle of the Second World War, Schumpeter, a great Austrian-born economist who for a period taught at Harvard, argued that the hero of capitalism, the entrepreneur, was doomed. He saw the only business figure worthy of myth-making being displaced (if not devoured) by managers, boardrooms, and shareholders. Weirdly, he saw this as part of the rise of socialism. The hero of capitalism would be smothered by the machine of corporate governance.


Of course, he was wrong. The myth of the heroic entrepreneur has persisted. It is today represented by figures like Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos. But in our era, no other entrepreneur captured the public's imagination more than the late Steve Jobs. He started Apple with a friend in his parents' garage. Later, he was thrown out of the corporation. Later still, he returned to Apple and, after making it one of the greatest corporations of our times, died at the relatively young age of 56.

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Last-Minute Plans: 98 Free, Cheap & Easy Things To Do in Seattle This Weekend: Feb 22-24, 2019

Check out more than 300 works on paper for sale (on Friday) and revisit Anthony Whites curated show (on Friday and Saturday) at While Supplies Last and Ultra Light Beams.
Check out more than 300 works on paper for sale (on Friday) and revisit Anthony White's curated show (on Friday and Saturday) at While Supplies Last and Ultra Light Beams.

Panicking because you don’t know what to do this weekend and you're short on cash? Don't worry—below, find all of your options for last-minute entertainment that won't cost more than $10, ranging from Love in the Market, and from Vaginomicon to Mama's Thirsty: A Queer Valentine's Day Afterparty. For even more options, check out our complete Things To Do calendar, our list of cheap & easy things to do in Seattle all year long, and our roundup of places to watch the 2019 Academy Awards ceremony.

Stay in the know! Get all this and more on the free Stranger Things To Do mobile app (available for iOS and Android), or delivered to your inbox.

FRIDAY

COMMUNITY
1. People's Town Hall for a Green New Deal
Here's your chance to talk about the details of the AOC-backed Green New Deal—a set of proposed programs that aim to address climate change and economic inequality—at a town hall led by youth activist group Sunrise Movement. Senators Maria Cantwell and Patty Murray will be in attendance.
(Downtown, free)

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How to Make Friends in Seattle

It’s difficult to strike up a conversation with people who are doing this (which everyone in Seattle is at all times).
It’s difficult to strike up a conversation with people who are doing this (which everyone in Seattle is at all times). SKYNESHER/GETTY IMAGES

People say Seattle is an unfriendly city, but that's not quite true: It's actually a cold, gloomy, cliquish, cultish, and unfriendly city. As you will soon find out, it's also not an easy place to make friends. This is especially true if you don't believe in astrology, which wide swaths of Seattle are as devoted to as nuns are to God.

I learned this the hard way, and more than once. When I first moved here five years ago (it feels more like 50), I went out with a potential new friend who immediately asked for my astrological sign. "Wait!" she said. "Let me guess." She got it right on the twelfth try. Right around then, I remembered that I had a late-night dentist appointment and left. And that was one of my more successful friend dates.

I never had trouble meeting people before Seattle. At first, I did the thing you are supposed to do to meet people: I joined a running club. Just kidding! Why would anyone do that? I actually went to bars and tried talking to people. This technique had been successful in other cities—but in Seattle, I found that most people were less interested in strangers than in their iPhones.

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Ten Unique Seattle Margaritas To Try For National Margarita Day

Not your dads Margaritaville: The new spicy margarita at Pablo y Pablo is made with house-infused jalapeño tequila and garnished with a pepper.
Not your dad's Margaritaville: The new spicy margarita at Pablo y Pablo is made with house-infused jalapeño tequila and garnished with a pepper. Pablo y Pablo / Instagram

Though the weather may not seem particularly hospitable to frosty-drink-guzzling, today is National Margarita Day, as good of an excuse as any to partake in some salty, limey elixirs with a side of tacos. However, that doesn't mean you need to settle for any old marg. Below, we've gathered a compilation of tequila-laced libations that venture beyond the usual blend—from spicy ones to avocado-based ones to pineapple-infused ones. For more ideas, check out our recommended Mexican restaurants or our food & drink calendar.

Barrio
The Northwest-inspired Mexican kitchen and bar's blood orange margarita is carbonated and consists of reposado tequila, cane syrup, lime, and blood orange.

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Life Is Not All That: Human-Made DNA Works Just as Well as Natural DNA

Gattaca
Gattaca Columbia Pictures

There is a major difference between the 1997 movie Gattaca and its original script. The former doesn't explain the exact goal of the space mission to Saturn's moon Titan, but the latter does. It is to find the origins of life. What screenwriter Andrew Niccol (also the director) had in mind was to connect the space mission (old tech) with what at the time, mid-'90s, was all the rage—the human genome, the sequencing of which (new tech) began in 1990 and was declared completed in 2003. The feeling at the time was that the answers of life would finally be exposed. There would be no more mysteries. Your DNA was you and your fate. This was the new mechanism. A Newtonism in space and your body. The name of the film, Gattaca, is, of course, based on four chemicals that many imagined life came down to: guanine, cytosine, adenine and thymine (G, C, A, and T).

It turns out that cutting the connection between life and space travel from the final film was right. Life is not just about the DNA molecule (the materials of which Niccol imagined came to earth from somewhere in space—panspermia); and the private and government projects to sequence the human genome did not expose life as it is but instead, took pictures of a part of it. It also turns out that the environment matters, and there is a hyper-genome that involves viral and bacterial players, including those that are specific to humans. Life is a complex process, not a hard thing (your DNA). There is more. Scientists have recently made synthetic DNA that can function with natural DNA. And so the old fixed sequence of G, C, A, and T can be doubled to form a DNA molecule. What this means is there is nothing really special (or "magic") about the "four chemicals that evolved on Earth."

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